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August 20th, 2007

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November 19th, 2005

01:33 am - Rambling with boredom I have finally got the old scanner working and know how to put pics on livejournal. So out of boredom I grabed some of my nearest pics and scanned them..........AHHHH yes I am a genius. Current Mood: calm Current Music: Ava snoring

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September 11th, 2005

11:39 pm - Tracking my life through internet test the Cutting Edge (61% dark, 57% spontaneous, 31% vulgar) your humor style: CLEAN | SPONTANEOUS | DARK Your humor's mostly innocent and off-the-cuff, but somehow there's something slightly menacing about you. Part of your humor is making people a little uncomfortable, even if the things you say aren't themselves confrontational. You probably have a very dry delivery, or are seriously over-the-top. Your type is the most likely to appreciate a good insult and/or broken bone and/or very very fat person dancing. PEOPLE LIKE YOU: David Letterman - John Belushi The 3-Variable Funny Test! - it rules - If you're interested, try my latest: The Terrorism Test My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 78% on darkness You scored higher than 72% on spontaneity You scored higher than 35% on vulgarity Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on Ok Cupid

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June 27th, 2005

12:35 am - The things we do when we are having fun This morning well yesterday morning I found myself unable to sleep which is odd b/c since I have been living here in Brunswick I have been sleeping like a baby. I stared at my Guilty Gear action figures with tons of thoughts raceing in my head. One thought was am I where I should be is he worth giving up a life I had in Jacksonville for. I then turn over and see him looking at me with smiles and my thoughts of dought leave. How did I end up here? So where'd you go? How was your vacation home? Well obviously you were busy, too busy for me. So this is how you leave me? I'm broken hearted on the floor. My tears seep through the crack under my door. Where i am locked in, shut down. I'm so tired of picking myself up off the ground. So Happy Valentine's Day. I hope the sun's out in new york. I hope he bought you roses. I hope he bought you roses. So Happy Valentine's Day. I hope the sun's out in New York. I hope he bought you roses. I hope he bought you roses Current Mood: blank Current Music: NONE!!!!!!

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June 19th, 2005

08:12 pm - I have a home and heart somewhere far from here I had never planed to feel this way this soon and this ready to be on my own with someone like I do with him. I came to Jax. hoping for fun and it was good to see people but I longed to be next to him and I'll be happy when I get home tonight. He knows how to make me feel like I'm something more than just his girl friend and I love every moment we spend together. My parents are on my side about my move now and completely support which makes it even feel more right than before. Right now I'm printing my resume 10 copies. I found out today my sister in law has been throwing away letters my brother has been writting me and making him think his whole family hates him which pisses me off quite a bit. Well the song of the day is...... I thought it kind of fit my beside the fact that I'm not dead hahahah. I thought that you were joking When you said you couldn't breathe You said you couldn't breathe Turns out that you were choking On a town you couldn't leave You knew you'd never leave It met your disapproval at the age of 8 years old You were only 8 years old From then on there was no removal From that one way dead end road That one way dead end road I thought that you were laughing When you cried your eyeballs out You cried your eyeballs out And i don't mean to be prying But what were you so sad about What are you still sad about Met your disappointment at the age of 9 years old You were only 9 years old From then on there would be no ointment To take away these burns To make that pain grow dull and forever ain't that long When your smile's stuck in your head like a pop song All you think about is death Your dirty head has gone unswept for way too long now For way too long now I thought that you were sleeping When i found you there in bed I found you there in bed When i touched you you were freezing It turned out that you were dead It turned out that you were dead It met your disapproval at the age of 8 years old You were only 8 years old From then on there was no removal From your fucked up head and your broken home and forever ain't that long When your smile's stuck in your head like a pop song All you think about is death Your dirty head has gone unswept for way too long now For way too long now For way too long now For way too long now Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: Alkaline Trio

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June 16th, 2005

05:34 am - I'm tired and still have to be up for another 12 hours Today today I have to apply at a few places. I'm going to a appartment complex to apply for a leasing aggent at Eagles Point I hope this goes go. I NEED A JOB!!! Me, and Beau found a place today that excepts pets YAY! I think I will post some pics today just b/c I can........ He looks like an anime char. I will marry this guy! The song of today is and this one is fro my nieces b/c they love this song and request each time they get in my car.... Johnny joined the army The cause he didn't know He served three years In the Middle East You know it doesn't show Johnny was a soldier He can't dance anymore When he came out He tried to form a band But he's only got one leg And he can hardly stand Now he drinks alone He gets sentimental He watches girls dance And he's thrown away his medals Current Mood: mellow Current Music: VH1

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June 14th, 2005

01:24 am - Yeah yeah sine you been gone! Well I am now Miss GA. goddamnit! I have got all my clothes and some of my stuff here but my room in Jax. is still full of my shit and my bunny and cat are still there. Today me and Beau went looking for a place to live, but all we found were shitty places in the ghetto. What the fuck am I thinking moving to Brunswick, GA.. It will not be for lon like may a few months. I decided to move here b/c of a job that Beau's mom is going to try to get me which will be great if she does also I moved here b/c rent is cheap, and me and him plan to save up so in a few months we can take our hike to Maine which will be amazing might I say! I also felt like I was going loney at my house, and needed something new something away from my family I love and miss them already but I needed to go away. I quit UPS there is no way my rings were coming off my neck fuck them! Song of the day ISSS!!!! I've said and once too often, some things I'd never say again. in streams of thoughts unbroken I fish for a few good men Sundays and holidays and twelve hours straight no pay for bloody hands and believe me they pay a petty wage my poor self pity speaks with sobbing, mumbled words strewn with the awful taste of bad, cowardly prose I'd take some time to get my posture set straight if I had the chance I'd break and subdue the scheming hands of fate. Wrap up your limp red mass of knuckles and fingertips it's fighting time and time to battle with your wits, time to spit back when you're spit upon, when you're left for head. time to hit the road when the road you're on had run out of tricks And I don't want your Sundays & holidays of twelve hours straight no pay for bloody hands, no I don't want your f**king petty wage! Current Mood: calm Current Music: Me singing to myself

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June 11th, 2005

10:44 pm - So things die Ok well UPS is going good for the fact I have to take of my neckless that has my parents wedding bans on it I haven't took those off since I was like 15 the day they gave them to me, all be I need a job I'm selling myself out and taking them off. Well this happen Thursday my day was going good till I tried to leave and the guard sent me back in and to get a written ok that the rings were mine that I didn't steal I was wanting to just throw a fit right then, well then I get the note and get some guy give me a line of shit why he wouldn't write me permission so I could wear them dadada. After leaving the gate I get in the car totally mad and ready to go OFF so I put in Against Me and my car starts fucking up there I am stressed thinking my car is about to blow up but it didn't so I cotuined to drive home and on my way onto the highway a trck ran the light almost hit I slamed the brakes and the man behind me beeped his horn and called me a stupid bitch just b/c I didn't want to get hit and starts to drive around right then I just broke down into tears. So then I'm guessing the guy seen me crying and followed me to the gas station and apologized for being a DICK so he said and gave me 5bucks in gas GOD DAMN being a girl is great sometimes if I knew crying could get you anything I would have done that long time ago. Well the day got better after Beau came and got me I hung out with the past couple of days and let's say the rings are still around my neck! Song of today is only to make it right When you sleep, No one is homeless. When you sleep, You can't feel the hunger. When you sleep, No one is lonely in a dream. Without classes, Without nations... When you sleep, She's standing there with open arms, And one night could last forever, And if you asked her, She'd never let go, And you'd stay forever... And the sun's always rising In the sky somewhere, And if young hearts should explode From all the lies they've been told... Let the new night bring you peace And the promise of tomorrow, Where we can wake to a new beginning. Tomorrow I'll all but have lost their faces; My friends and family, Memories of all we had And the times we should have lived, And tomorrow America just might fall apart. Tomorrow, tell me, Where will you wake up? Beyond title, beyond these careers and laws, Something more than borders on a map... And the sun's always rising in the sky somewhere, And if young hearts should explode From all the lies they've been told... To live through one night like this, I would trade it for the silence... Current Mood: tired Current Music: Loretta Lynn

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June 8th, 2005

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June 3rd, 2005

10:00 pm - My mother plays Start Fox like a Pro! So I cleaned my room did some running around and gave Maggie a bath this week. Oh how uneventful I have been lately. I went to the Zoo Sat. with Beau and the nieces I liked that a lot and then Monday after I got back from UPS he came and picked me up and I hung out with him for a few days. So now I'm home and bored but don't want to do anything but sit in my PJ's. I was suppost to do somthing with Seleda, but it looks like I will be watching The Seed of Chucky instead but that's cool with me. The song of today is..... I got a song stuck in my head walking down street #9 i sing it out loud with my friends and were all having a good time we all waited for weeks now we're hangin on the street in NYC we gotta go to the show ever though were all underage. Outside the firehall in PA it rained on 300 kids all day when the cops shut it down no one went away we're gonna play no matter what they say. 3 or 4 people showed up in Alburquerque the alternator died somewhere between Mankato and Rapid city Strangers in some strange lands in LA the enchiladas made us sick but that's ok. Growing up we didn't wanna be like them it was tough to know who were our friends killing time playing basements way back when in a lot of ways nothing's changed from now and then some say they've been left out i wonder why they still hang around i wonder where these sure things could be then i realized that somehow i found them in me we're gonna play no matter what they say. This makes me think of old times Current Mood: dorky Current Music: Bouncing Souls

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12:12 am - Naw I don't like it up the butt! So yeah why did I think doing an online class would be easy? I fucking hate this it's driving me nuts I hate online classes I would rather take my lazy ass to class than set here on this comp. Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: Crickets

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June 2nd, 2005

04:35 pm - I feel the weightlessness coming in Ok I have decided everytime I write an entry I will put a song of the day on it. So here is todays song of the day A boy loved a girl but the girl said No She ran away with a handsome Gigolo He loved her but they were through So he fed himself to the lions at the zoo Romeo and Juliet, a wierdo couple that I met They had a little drink with a strange effect Some mistakes you can't correct Ain't it sad about the boys' and the girls' Ain't it sad about the whole damn world Love is a thing you can't control When you're young or when you're old And I don't play sympathetic parts So you can keep your broken heart Current Mood: dirty Current Music: The Adicts (duh)

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May 31st, 2005

01:35 am - BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM! I just did it! Current Mood: satisfied Current Music: Cry Baby (the movie)

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May 29th, 2005

12:52 pm - PUNKS NOT DEAD AHHAHAHA! I've got 54321 I've got a red pair of high-heels on Tumble me over, it doesn't take much Tumble me over, tumble me, push In my red high-heels I've no control The rituals of repression are so old You can do what you like, there'll be no reprisal I'm yours, yes I'm yours, it's my means of survival I've got 54321 Come on my love, I know you're strong Push me hard, make me stagger The pain in my back just doesn't matter You force-hold me above the ground I can't get away, my feet are bound So I'm bound to say That I'm bound to stay Well today I look so good Just like I know I should My breasts to tempt inside my bra My face is painted like a movie star I've studied my flaws in your reflection And put them to rights with savage correction I've turned my statuesque perfection And shone it over in your direction So come on darling, make me yours Trip me over, show me the floor Tease me, tease me, make me stay In my red high-heels I can't get away I'm trussed and bound like an oven ready bird But I bleed without dying and I won't say a word Slice my flesh and I'll ride the scar Put me into gear like your lady car Drive me fast and crash me crazy I'll rise from the wreckage as fresh as a daisy These wounds leave furrows as they heal I've travelled them, they're red and real I know them well, they're part of me My birth, my sex, my history They grew with me, my closest friend My pain's my own, my pain's my end Clip my wings so you know where I am I can't get lost while you're my man Tame me so I know your call I've stabbed my heels so I am tall I've bound my twisted falling fall Beautiful mute against the wall Beautifully mutilated as I fall Use me, don't lose me I've got 54321 I've got a red pair of high-heels on Strap my ankles, break my heels Make me kneel, make me feel Turn, turn, turn, like a clockwork doll Put in your key and give me a whirl Tease me, tease me, the reason to play In my red high-heels I can't get away I'll be your bonsai, your beautiful bonsai Your black-eyed bonsai, erotically rotting Will my tiny feet fit your desire? Warped and tied I walk on fire Burn me out, twist my wrists I promise not to shout, beat me with your fists Squeeze me, squeeze me, make me feel In my red high-heels I'm an easy kill Tease me, Tease me, make me see You're the only one, I need to be me Thankyou, will you take me? Thankyou, will you make me? Thankyou, will you break me? Use me, don't lose me Taste me, don't waste me Use, lose, taste, waste. Goodness this was an amazing song, what happen to me and being all punk rock. Current Mood: bored Current Music: Silence

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May 27th, 2005

08:13 pm - I have decided being a hermit is great! I have travel the seas and look as far my eyes could see, but nothing has compared to you! Damn! I think Beau maybe moving in my house with my family etc. for a while this is soooooooo crazy. Current Mood: artistic Current Music: I wish I knew where some of them were

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May 24th, 2005

03:23 am - Stick em UP! I think I will be braking up with Beau soon! He's a moron............... Please help me NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh I'm going to die.. Current Mood: crappy Current Music: Beau's dumbass mouth talking to me

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May 21st, 2005

11:21 pm - I dought my mind, but trust my heart I have for once in my life feel complete, I don't know if it will last but I feel whole. I start UPS at 7:15am today I start the training so in 2 weeks from now I will be loaded YES! Current Mood: happy Current Music: The Adicts

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May 20th, 2005

04:42 am - I miss your Fred Kruger hat. Tonight was fun but at the sametime the most depressing night ever. I went and see Kevan's band play had a blast totally moshed like I was punk rock again hahaha. I had the longest ride home of holding back tears. I just was around a place that use to feel like home but now I was unwanted. I use to be his world, and I adored him but now his life has changed and his heart seems bitter and he's grown cocky ways. I miss the person he use to be with all of my heart, in my mind he was the most amazing person. I never knew how much he meant to me till I threw him away. So therefore I feel like I caused him to be the way he is now, and I hate it. I'm not pining over him but I miss him I miss who he was I miss what was my best friend so these days I feel so lonely just for the fact I don't have a best friend like that. I don't want a relationship with him just for the fact I don't have his friendship. I miss dearly more than anything in this world, and I would do and give anything to have it back. I don't think he ever knew or knows how much he means to me on that thought I don't ever let anyone know what they mean to me. On another note seen the new Kelly Clarkson video it's amazing and I totally cried to it too. I'm completely LAME now. Seems like just yesterday You were a part of me I used to stand so tall I used to be so strong Your arms around me tight Everything, it felt so right Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong Now I can't breathe No, I can't sleep I'm barely hanging on Here I am, once again I'm torn into pieces Can't deny it, can't pretend Just thought you were the one Broken up, deep inside But you won't get to see the tears I cry Behind these hazel eyes I told you everything Opened up and let you in You made me feel alright For once in my life Now all that's left of me Is what I pretend to be So together, but so broken up inside 'Cause I can't breathe No, I can't sleep I'm barely hangin' on Here I am, once again I'm torn into pieces Can't deny it, can't pretend Just thought you were the one Broken up, deep inside But you won't get to see the tears I cry Behind these hazel eyes Swallow me then spit me out For hating you, I blame myself Seeing you it kills me now No, I don't cry on the outside Anymore... Here I am, once again I'm torn into pieces Can't deny it, can't pretend Just thought you were the one Broken up, deep inside But you won't get to see the tears I cry Behind these hazel eyes Here I am, once again I'm torn into pieces Can't deny it, can't pretend Just thought you were the one Broken up, deep inside But you won't get to see the tears I cry Behind these hazel eyes Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Maggie snoring

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May 18th, 2005

11:47 pm - I'm dancing on time till it runs out I ran from the past and old friends and I have yet to look back, and I'm not going to. I like the road that I am on I love the people I'm around and my heart has grown two sizes too big. I have enjoyed myself and found myself smiling more than I have in the past 2yrs. I don't hold grudes against anyone but I'm just happy some people are out of my life now. Current Mood: dirty Current Music: Against me

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May 17th, 2005

02:09 am - My love letter and fariy tale seem to have dissappeared when I met you i don't care what they say those numbers don't mean a thing we've got it made this world is just me and you and we know just what to do we've got it made hey, everythings gonna be okay (we've got it made together) hey, everythings gonna be okay (we've got it made) i don't care if we get a job we've already got a life we've got it made i don't know what the future holds all i know is you're there with me that's all i need hey, everythings gonna be okay (we've got it made together) when i look in your eyes i know what i want in life nothing more, nothing less nothing more, nothing less (everything's gonna be okay) nothing more, nothing less (everything's gonna be okay) be the key to my success nothing more, nothing less That one was for Beau hahahaha I have had THE DESCENDENTS stuck in my head ever since the beach I go to UPS today YAY! Current Mood: giggly Current Music: DESCENDENTS

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